Absence Makes The Fart Go Longer

  Men take pride in farting. The smellier the better. Yuk! I do my best to keep a little bit of pride and dignity about the place (as well as Febreeze) being the only female. But today, around 3-ish, while the guys were watching the footie, I let one out from the kitchen that even I had to laugh at. Around ten second long and nearly to the tune of Tie A Yellow Ribbon Round The Old Oak Tree. 

I'd skipped breakfast, empty tum tum, and felt a bit bloated and sore. You know how women are, trying to suppress the dastardly deed. But I didn't expect to compete within the lads' level. This IS going in the diary, but will be worded femininely. Better out than suffering, eh?  Ah, well. I suppose it's sulphur the best.
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